February Fourth

There’s good days, and there’s bad days.
This week has been full of bad days. Today especially has been awful. It’s a good thing I have half a bottle of Chardonnay and a left over pizza waiting for me in my apartment.  Despite today being pretty horrendous, I have made a big decision and that it to cancel my work study in the Anthropology department on campus. Seeing as I am no longer an AIS major and all I do is busy work- it has become very non-beneficial to me to maintain the position. Now, all I have to do is let my boss know my reason for leaving, but I think she might cry.

In reality, most of the time I’m either doing homework at work, or I’m doing busy work that is 110% pointless. By quitting my work study I will no longer have to travel to campus as often, nor will I have to stay more than necessary. Which will be great both for my car and my mental health. When I am in town here I am miserable, like it’s a curse. The less time I need to spend in this place, the better off I will be in the long run. I can move home sooner, and look for a new job there. Plus, by quitting my work study I will have more time to strictly focus on my homework and not be interrupted by little tedious tasks… Also, by quitting, my school will allow me to take out a small loan to cover my expenses: in which the sum is considerably greater than the sum of my paychecks. THUS, I can stop worrying about rent for the last few months of school.I have been double checking my facts and my budget the last few days and have come to the conclusion that cancelling my work study is my best viable option at this point in time.

The thing that kicked off my awful day though was my beginning fiction workshop… I received very little feedback and none of it was positive. Joy. What better way to crush my confidence in my writing. My boyfriend told me not to take it to heart, but with unanimous distaste towards my work it’s hard not to. Writing is sort of my life, and when people don’t think it’s good… Well that hurts. I guess it’s time to try something new. Maybe a happy ending for a change.

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